Daddy Loves Dongs - A stupid song about a gay father coming out to his son

Hey son, there's something I've got to say,

Was up all night but couldn't figure out the way.

Screw it, you don't need to know today,

Fuck it, I'm gay.

I'm gay.

I'm gay.

You heard it, I'm gay.

Those 'business trips' I spent perusing through groins,

Moaning as young Ramesh held my loins

Don't judge me, it took years to find my voice,

I like penises, please respect my choice.

I was in the closet till noon,

My clothes never felt right, couldn’t get here soon.

The tie was too tight on my neck,

It's sore, I just deep-throated someone hung like Shrek!

(Chorus) Daddy loves Dongs

Daddy loves Dongs

Daddy loves Dongs

Daddy loves Dongs

NOOOO

Please don't call mom's number

Sleeping with her had become a slumber,

I may have filled her holes but I felt so hollow,

Dicks are so good I tell you, I never spit, I only swalloooooow.

Lacey, edible, French-Cut or G-string, she tried every thong,

But what do I say, daddy only loves dongs.